“I Make My Own Rules,” by Jess Gonacha Swift
The biggest thing I learned when I pounded the pavement as an actor was, well, me – my uniquity, my spark, what makes me different & where I thrive. From those handful of post-college years, I learned that I loved (& got cast!) singing loud & funny; creating new, SNL-like characters; portraying multiple roles at once; & being quirky / enthusiastic / spunky / offbeat. Once I put those pieces together & the lightbulb went off over my head (I may or may not have shouted, “Eureka!”), I made sure to absolutely positively bring my quirky, spunky, offbeat enthusiasm into the room the first time I entered, whether it was visually with the polka-dot dress I wore (with matching headband!)& the headshot with a bright blue background or audibly with the song I sang to show that I was both funny & loud (with a killer mix/belt)! Allowing me to be me let me be secure with bringing myself into the room & put me at ease almost instantly. I’ve been able to bring that in to my coaching, & pair it with what I know makes me spark (writing, speaking, coaching, collaborating, relationship building). I’m able to look & see what is in line with my authenticity, because I know what makes me, um, me.

I have two clients I’m currently working with that are going through just that. These are vivacious, fun, enthusiastic, funny, talented, inspiring women who don’t quite believe that what they have to offer – their particular services as well as their engaging personalities – would equate to anything that anyone would pay for. These two women in particular are looking to work for themselves, but even if they were applying for jobs where someone else wrote the paycheck, they would come across the same dilemma: Buttoning themselves up, not allowing their real selves to shine through, & thinking they had to be a certain way/thing/person in order to get the job. They probably wouldn’t take the time or effort to discover where they shine & what gives them their uniquity, & having the world miss out on that makes me sad.

Whether you’re an artist launching a new Etsy shop or a writer looking for a full-time gig or an assistant looking to enter PR, being authentic is what will set you apart. Some will call it Branding, but how boring is that (& hello, what a way to bring on a case of the Shoulds!) Your uniquity is what makes you interesting. Your uniquity is what others will relate to. Your uniquity is what will get you the sales, the clients, and/or the job. Your uniquity is why people will want to work with you. Your uniquity is you.

But how do you find your uniquity? (more…)

Magnet by Aimee of Artsyville. Put these back in your shop, Aimee!

Believe it or not, with all the excitement going on, I couldn’t think of a “good” question (isn’t that such a relative word?) for today’s installment of Tough (Question) Tuesday. So I started looking through my Inspiration folder on Evernote (yup, I clip all the images that I come across that excite me & keep ‘em there for a rainy day/blog post) & came across this wonderful saying from Aimee. It got me thinking about how I’m taking myself away from an environment where I most certainly do not bloom (thank you very much!), & into one where I thrive. I grow. I stretch. I reach. I spark. I love. I connect. I bloom.

So tell me, tell me:

Where do you bloom? (more…)

The Tiny Little Adventurous Bird by FreyaArt

Even with all the fantabulous stuff that’s been going on with me lately, I’m still feeling the agita as to whether or not I’ll “make it” as a full-time coach. So, instead of thinking of this as my Goal or My Life’s Purpose (ack! scariness!), I’ve decided to think of it as An Adventure. That frame of thinking – that my Goal isn’t the end-all-be-all-most-important-thing-of-my-life-ever – certainly keeps me focused on enjoying the journey, making sure there’s fun involved & seeing where these opportunities lead – which is what the Grown-Up (& innerpreneur) in me wants to focus on!

Join me in the comments by answering:

What’s your next adventure? (more…)

And we’ve only just begun by Chris Piascik

This is another scary post for me, guys. Like Dear Future Me, this was a word doc that I wrote for myself, to tuck away for me as a journal entry while my journals are still packed in a box.  But as I finished, I realized that this could serve as the more authentic posts I’ve been yearning to put here that could possibly bring some of you comfort or inspiration or comraderie or strength. And if there’s a chance I can offer that to you, what kind of selfish twit would I be to keep that to myself? And when you get to the end of the post, I think you’ll see why I felt that I had to post this, in keeping with the intention of putting myself Out There. Enjoy my diary entry (gulp)!

It’s my Me Time now. I haven’t taken an official, scheduled Me Time in probably, oh….too long. I can’t remember the last time it’s been on my calendar. There’s been unofficial Me Time here & there – time for a bath, or reading the paper, or somesuch Me Thing – but nothing that’s been a gift: Here’s 90 minutes. It’s for you.

So here I sit, sideways in the big red patterned chair so I can look right out my window onto the NYC skyline: a green & white Empire State Building, a gold twinkly bridge, the Chrysler Building that shines, well, like the top of the Chrysler Building. I saw a Broadway & Musicals station on Pandora when I was browsing, & I clicked on it. I don’t remember the last time I listened to show tunes when I wasn’t a passenger in my mother’s car. Bernadette Peters is singing “Everything’s Coming Up Roses” & I’m on the verge of tears.

You can do it
All you need it a hand
We can do it
Mama is gonna see to it! (more…)

Flying Girl Cuts It Away or Let Go of All That is Not Yours by Rowena Murillo (of the fab blog Warrior Girl)

I won’t lie -I’m feeling a bit of Overwhelm lately. There’s a lotta stuff on my plate – a lot of it things I want to do, which makes it tough to prioritize – and I’m starting to get a case of the Shoulds. Do you feel the same?

Then join me in asking yourself this:

What “should” do you want to let go of? (more…)

Me at my GraduLaunch Party in June, celebrating my new Spark.

Today is my 32nd birthday.

I joke that I’m an old lady, but honestly, I don’t feel it. Yeah, I see the lone gray hair appear when it’s too long between colorings (there’s a bright one now in my bangs!), & there was a point in my life that I was always (proudly!) The Youngest (usually when I was doing shows), but honestly, really, deeply, truly:

I love being 32. I know it, even though it’s just been the case for a few hours. (more…)

Don’t Fit In on wordboner

As the year winds down & I’m thinking of what I want 2010 to look like, I’ve become very focused on how I’m different from The Pact, & how I can express that so that it’s noticeably obvious to everyone. It’s tougher than it seems, as most of us spend our whole lives (at least our childhood) trying to not seem “weird” or “quirky” or whatever other wonderful adjective the world at large doeesn’t embrace.

So let me ask you today:

How do you not fit in? (more…)

Why I Love Etsy, Reason #592: Use “sausage” as a search term & get 11 PAGES of hits. One of them was this awesome Breakfast Necklace from chinachichi (see the sausage? like a link? for “freakin’ (great links) friday”? I’m hilarious)

Is it me, or has this been the longest week ever recorded in the history of the world? It seems like it should be next Wednesday already! Looking forward to a weekend full of sleep, coaching, running, Dave & Busters-ing, diva-watching, & friend-catching-uping.

Here are yo links!:

• If this post from White Hot Truth wasn’t so freakin’ good, I would have stolen this question for Tough (Question) Tuesday: What failures are you grateful for?
• Here’s another great freakin’ question, this time from Small Notebook: How do you start the day? And yes, for those of you that read my answer to last week’s Tough (Question) Tuesday, I’m going to start it with 15 minutes of yoga on Monday. Send good get-outta-bed thoughts!
• Striving to be imperfect? a beautiful ripple effect gives you An Imperfect 10.
• “…when we walk around in the world pretending to be confident and creative and strong, then a funny thing happens. we become confident and creative and strong.” Read more from the genius of Kelly Rae Roberts in pretending until we’re not pretending anymore.
• As you know, I love anything having to do with uniquity. Mashable wrote about The 5 People Who Broke the Rules of Social Media and Succeeded, which showcases uniquity in spades. I especially love #4.
• Awake @ the Wheel confirms that The Problem IS You. But in a nice way.
• Escape from Cubicle Nation will soon be in book form! You can download the 1st chapter of the book (for free!) here & pre-order the book here.

(more…)

Think of all the titles you hold: daughter, wife, Dad, boss, coach, friend…it can go on & on.

Now, put all those titles out of your head. Whatever applies to you doesn’t, just for this moment.

What’s your role in the world?

I’ll share my personal answer in the comments section. Hope you’ll join me! (more…)

Thank you, Keri Smith. I need this this week.

I’ve always wanted a tattoo. This would be a good one.
The entire Motivation Monday series can be found here.