@Carmen – You brought up such a good point: the feelings that go along with passion. And if you don't know yet what makes you giddy, excited, etc than it needs to be found! But I think there's also a mistake in thinking that a passion has to be an activity or a "career" – it doesn't. I love that your 7 year old is passionate about his mohawk haircut! As adults, we tend to think, "well, I can't make my mohawk haircut into a career, so what good does it do me?" – but just having that passion – & deciding if/how you wanna act on it (open a haircutting place that only gives mohawks, for example) – is enough to guide you.

Passion is how one goes about doing something, not what they end up doing. My passion is and always has been cheerleading. When I realized this, it didn't seem relevant anymore. Almost like a long lost dream that was too far gone to even consider resurecting. But digging a little deeper and reflecting a bit on what's going on now in my life, I see how cheering for other people can fit into my career goals.

I think passion is about how I feel when I think about something, how I feel when I'm doing it and how I feel when it's done. When I'm passionate about what I'm up to, it's evident. Giddiness ensues. I'm excited to share, connect and collaborate.

Think about the people in your life, you know what they're passionate about (whether they do or not) right?

My mom – she's passionate about animals and her spiritual beliefs.

My sister – photography and her home.

My husband – his patients and fishing.

My dad – his creative side. He's a welder and when he creates something by hand, he lights up.

My 8 year old – her stories and her videos… and designing clothes.

My 7 year old – he's passionate about gaming… and his new mohawk haircut.

and my mom's dog… he's passionate about chasing mice in the wood pile and finding frogs. His passion rocks my socks off! Who knew that even animals can have passion?!

I think everyone is passionate about something, or many things. I have many passions, but most of them are branches of the cheerleading tree.

Mucho love,

Carmen

I agree with you, Michelle – passion does exist & it's important to figure out what you want to do NOW. Hopefully it's something that you're passionate about right now. When you are no longer passionate about it, do something else that you're passionate about. Monitor your exits to make sure you aren't running away from something (running TOWARD is much more fun), and keep it moving.

Society (and that includes many of our loved-ones) likes us to be consistent because then we are easy to monitor and our behavior is easy to predict. Passion, however, requires that we be governed by our gut. Contrary to popular belief, passion is not about being reckless – it's more reckless to squander life by settling for a passionless existence. Passion is about making the most of life by doing what really matters to you.

It's been my experience though, that the people who say they don't have anything they are passionate about, or who don't believe in it, have some combination of three things in common:

1) They've been disconnected from their dreams. These are the same people of whom you can ask what their dream is and they'll tell you they don't know, don't have one, or forgot it long ago. It's hard to be passionate when you have no dreams (I think).

2) As Kate said, they are currently immersed in soul draining work. They let that take all their strength and energy, and so it's hard to find enough to stir up passion, even for the things they love (but probably aren't doing).

3) They haven't discovered their "thing" yet. Maybe they just haven't experienced enough yet, or maybe they limit themselves due to internal or external rules, and so they have yet to try or DO their passion. My husband didn't start martial arts (Passion #1) till his late twenties, almost thirty, and didn't start running (his full on passion lately) until last year at 35. Some of us just need to try new things.

These are things I've observed about the people who struggle with the idea of passion. I think it's less a belief in it, than an experience of it. I think we you never get to experience something, instead of saying something wrong with us, we say there's something wrong with the idea. Better to think there is no passion, than to think we are missing out on it for some reason.

Just my thoughts…

Yours,

Megan

@Kate – Amen & hallelujah! Hope this makes it into a post in the near future, as you have some terrific insight (spoiler: I'm gonna write one too for my next newsletter!). It DOES get so tough to pursue – or find! – a passion when you're stuck in a bad situation, whether it's personal or professional. And I think a lot of people (adults!) want that instant result, & may even think it's "too late" to find their passion. Hooey to that! It's all about cutting yourself some slack & making time to do what interests you.

@nycgirl0501 – My first crush was Kirk, too! No wonder we've become friends And I love what you wrote: "I’ve learned that life is just to short to not enjoy something about each day." I mean, it doesn't necessarily need to be about passion - it needs to be about enjoyment & making sure there's a piece of it that you can recognize every day. I have a feeling that when you make time for something you like doing each & every day, then the passion emerges from it's hiding place.

@Natalie – You make such great points, & I think your earlier fear of passion (having it be One Thing, having it be Love at First Sight, etc) is where the clients I've mentioned are at with it. But the funny thing it, you can be "passionate" about lots of things – even silly stuff like, I don't know, pretty office supplies. Does it mean you're gonna/have to devote your life to pretty office supplies? No, it doesn't! But does it give you a clue as to what you like aesthetically? Sure! And from how you describe it, it's more about being passionate about whatever it is you wanna work on in that moment. Just because you wanna make a charity calendar just means you're excited to make a charity calendar! That's really the parallel, I think.

@Jessica – Are you stealing my life coaching tactics? With my first client who was scared of the word "passion", I gave her the homework to start a Big Likes list. She's constantly adding to it & it runs the gamut of "riding in a convertible" to "tea on the patio" to certain textures and feeling of use to her friends & family. She's really getting to know herself better in that way, & I think that's even better than identifying that Passion. In my case, I was so super passionate about performing, and it's not that it went away, but it certainly waned, washed over by the icky business side of things in that world. I still love love love (OK, yes, "passionate about") getting on stage, but I don't have to make it my life. And that's the bottom line. And you're so right about passion equating to what gets your pumped in that moment. While I'm passionate about blogging, sometimes I downright don't feel like posting. Does that mean I'm unpassionate about it? Nope. I think people scared of "passion" think it's something that has to be done every day. They need that mindset shaken right outta them!

@Jill – Ooh, Jill, you brought up something new & something important right here: If you identify your passion & "fail" at it, then what's left? So, therefore, let's stay away from "passion" & play it safe so there's no fear of failing. It's so interesting because, in a way, I "failed" at acting (in the case of walking away from it), but I so don't see it that way. That passion, & living/pursuing it, led me to absolutely positively having to find a new passion when I decided that acting wasn't going to be my life/career any longer. And that led me here, to coaching, which is 200% my new passion. And ya know what? I might "fail" at this too, but everything that's gotten me here so far, well, is nothing but a very validating learning experience, & I know that I can't truly fail at this either. Oh, and watch the "shoulds", lady. It's a 4 letter word in my book!

@Maggie – I love the differentiation between "passion" & "obsession." When I was engaged, I thought I had a passion for weddings – until I got married & realized I was no longer interested in all the wedding blogs/bulletin boards I had subscribed to! It's interesting to think about differentiating the two…

@Louise – It is, it is! I think that's why so many people are so scared of it. But what would happen if passion = fun / enjoyment / excitement? I wonder how we can make it lighter for everyone…

@Tiffany – You're on the money, & why I recommend The Renaissance Soul to everyone like you (& me!). The tagline is "for people with too many passions to pick just one" because, well, you don't have to! It's all about identifying those passions (or simply, the things that bring you energy & make you feel alive) & then making sure to incorporate 'em into your life.

@Kim – It's so interesting to bring up the little voice in the back of your mind, reminding you that it's there & you love it & it's waiting for you. I find a lot of times that my clients who come to me looking for a career change wind up eventually "picking" the career choice that they've come back to time & again, but have rejected for one reason or another. Listening to that quiet voice is so important!

Sometimes the passion is so much, that freezes you. I have seen it.
Sometimes like in my case, you have too many passions (like some said above) and you end up kind of spread too thinly.
So I guess a key question is, is your passion driving you or stopping you.

Great answers and opinions from everyone. Inspiring!

So yes, I believe in passion, but I also believe that it has many faces. I think we are often led to believe that it's an intense burning in our hearts and minds, and if we don't have that we think we lack passion. This is a great disservice to creative souls, and I hope we can all start having these conversations so we can spread the word that passion has many faces.

Thanks for the great question!