@Alexandra – That's such a tough part of growing up – saying "No" even when you want to! Kudos for setting the priorities now so that you don't burn-out later.

@Alisha – You're preaching to the choir! I came home Sun night & didn't leave the house again 'til Tue night – & that was because I had to go to rehearsal. But meanwhile, I know that if I don't at least take a walk every 48 hours I get draggy, grumpy, & a bit stircrazy. It's amazing how much we convince ourselves that we know better than what our body's trying to tell us!

@Sarah – Ugh, trust is the hardest thing ever. Ever! But it seems like you know that this is a decision that needs time & marination, so amen to listening! I know it won't steer you wrong.

@Jenny – Nobody would describe me as "patient" either. I want it all, & I want it now! But HOORAY for you in getting in – that's conquering the first step completely! It's tough, too, to be patient when things are out of your hands. Hang in there – I know the next steps will go your way, too!

@Tiffany – Ohmygosh, that's tough too! Jeez Louise Louise, you kids are killing me. I so know those real-life Vampires (as opposed to the one that lives in your head), & I find they're best slain (with the least amount of guilt or anger or confrontation) by really going through how you'd be comfortable slaying it. What needs to be said or done or shared in order to walk away & say, "I did that the best I could." Ugh, toughness! But remember, you can only control what you can control. Wouldn't it be fun if you controlled others, though? Evil!

@Sharon – So, so tough! Man, you guys aren't making it easy. I guess that's the point of tough (question) Tuesday, though You might wanna ask yourself what you need to make up your safety net. When you have that foundation down, it's usually a bit easier to make a decision/figure out a compromise/formulate a plan.

@Angela – Oh man, I've had to do that more than once. It goes back to what I said to Tiffany – you can only control what you can control, so if you figure out what you want to say/do & how you want to say it/do it with the least amount of anger/guilt, that's usually the compass in how you can move forward knowing you handled it the best you can.

@Olive&Hope – I have such a great visual of you (even though I don't know what you look like) of you in a garden, eyes closed, sitting Indian-style, surrounded by lush flowers, holding on to a glass of wine, & just listening to the sounds. We as people (especially in 2010!) are never quiet enough. Keep listening to what's being brought up in the quiet & you'll absolutely find your way. And thanks for the solidarity! I was impressed that I only had 1 glass of wine last night

@Angelique – Ah, serious dreams. Those are good ones because you can tell they're close to coming true. Let me know if you wanna talk, chica bonita!

@Stephanie – Thank you, thank you! And I agree – these answers are so timely & inspirational! I have such a nice home here on the Interwebs, thanks to all you guys!

@Jess – Oh no – tomorrow's today! Hope everything went as well as it could & you feel a bit lighter today.

@Jenn – Ah, the joys of being a coach. Isn't it interesting, though, that you can get on the line feeling sick/grumpy/angry/mad & feel it dissipate within minutes? At least that's what happens for me. It's sometimes a good thing to let yourself push through just to see what happens.

@Shellie – You got the goods, & that's half the battle! What would happen if you just decided to do one. little. thing. That's it. What would you do? How would you feel during? After? Feel free to bribe yourself with something awesome when you're done. And seriously – you don't wanna keep those hot pink floaties to yourself! That's amazing.

@Melissa – Sometimes those Big Change days are the nicest, along the lines of "no news is good news" & having an empty mailbox meaning no bills. Treasure it, or make it special by adding something a lil' special to your day (I treated myself to hot chocolate yesterday, & it so made me smile).

@Michele – So tough, but it seems like your heart's in the right place! Is there a middle ground here for you to give this feedback, but in a more positive/constructive way? I find that phrasing things positively & having the other person engage in the conversation by asking them questions puts you on the same team. I know you'll do great – I'm rooting for ya!

@Cass – Ooh, I see that rope getting smaller and smaller, & you're wondering if you're at the end. Bottom line is that you know it's gonna snap at some point, so even if you don't know when, can you do 1 thing today to keep you from moving forward to your breaking point?

@Kerri – Ah, procrastination! Such a friend. There was a study I heard recently that a person faced with having to buy 1 of 40 different types of jelly took way longer to pick a flavor than someone faced with having to buy 5 different types of jelly. Any way for you to narrow down your choices? I know it's tough, but you can put 'em in a list & ask yourself, "Would I rather do 1 or 2?" If 1 wins, cross off 2 & then ask, "Would I rather do 1 or 3?" & so on. Hope it helps!

I've got this work thing going on…it's work that I'm good at, that people depend on me for…but its work that I don't enjoy. So it's really a mater of if MY enjoyment is more or less important to me then letting people down.

Do I need to decide what to do about this today? Can I keep on keeping on? For how long?

P.S. I love these questions and glean so much information from the responses.

xoxo

Today's toughest decision was to go ahead with my workshop classes. I have a headache and the phone lines didn't like me – but I did it anyway and I think the participants got something out of each class.

Jenn B

Best of luck on navigating your tough decision! Whichever person you select will be a lucky duck, and also the perfectly right person for you.